Monday 11 January 2016

Darling we've been dating for awhile now and I was wondering, will you....go to therapy with me?

Times are changing, and I feel like the older I get the more the generations after me are evolving quicker than an ape turned into man.
Kids have the latest phones a lot earlier, my three year old niece gave me fashion advice and is already very body conscious, people are having children a lot earlier (but that's more of coming full circle than being a new thing) and people are getting into relationships a lot younger and a lot manage to stick it out for years.

So when do you think is a good age as a couple to go to therapy? Gone are the days where you could turn around to a 16 year old and say "you're too young to know what love is" because I alone know a good handful of couples who met at 16 and have made it past seven years, couples are having children as young as 18 and getting married at 20, and 25 year olds earning over the £30,000 mark. We're in a new young era where everything people expected to wait years for are happening straight away

So with all the new issues going on in today's society and all the bumps and bruises that come along with being in a relationship, when is it acceptable to say to your partner "I think we need couples therapy"?

Although life is being led at such as fast pace, the decision whether to stay in a relationship due to certain issues that therapy may be able to help is being overlooked if not even thought about, couples who maybe wanted to stay together but just couldn't get past certain issues and became more than acquainted with the term "sometimes love just isn't enough" could probably work it out with the help of someone who's sole job is to help.

What do you think people would say if 20 year olds started to go to therapy?
Would relationships last longer?
Could a therapist help the young couples with issues such as:
-  Getting into a relationship where the partner, if not both of you, already have children?
- Being a happy couple and then you get pregnant and you both end up splitting up?
- Getting married at a young age and having to adapt to the changes of your partner you never noticed before?

I myself go through the usual couple issues that everyone does and sometimes you find yourself going in circles with the same issues and I know many couples who say it's just not going anywhere, they're fighting about the same thing and so decide to call it a day and find someone better suited for them, but is leaving always the answer? How can you tell whether it won't happen in the next relationship?

Then there are the generations before us - our family, are they too close or too stuck in their own habits to help be a councilor? Or do you think they'll reminisce over their own relationships, be it successful or failed and bring their own prejudices into the conversation and subconsciously making you see things you never thought of before or strike a fear in you that you don't want to repeat in your own relationship.


Isn't it strange that though we have grown up faster than the generations before us, there are still some things that we consider we're too young for, although many go hand in hand, if you're going to start one thing, then why not get the other? Why is having a child within your acceptability of being an adult but getting therapy just that little bit much adult for you?


It's just a thought that crept up on me and I wondered what other people thought about the concept, do you think there is an age limit or time period when it's acceptable for us to start getting couples therapy or do you think it's something we should really start incorporating into our young lives? Would it save a lot of relationships and keep a lot of young families together?






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